Hey Love Muffins,

It’s WOW Wednesday! Sooooo, how was your day? Today, I have been completely present. I know life moves so fast that if you are not in tuned you will miss the blessings God has downloaded in you for the day. I used my time wisely today. Normally I would lay in bed for a long time and want to sleep the day away but today I felt the urge to empower myself today and listen to some encouraging words from a few speakers. I like to listen to one in particular, Dr. Dellaterro McNeal. I don’t get books often but I do listen to audible books to motivate me while I do household things around the house. Mostly when I exercise. I fell off that wagon months ago but I am motivated to do that once again and what helps is listening to motivational audible books.

I have been not really in a funk but in isolation for a few weeks. I have had some health challenges and the devil has been trying to grab a hold of my thoughts. I am grateful for the test because it is showing me how strong I really am. It’s funny how we have down moments and with hope, faith and believe we are out of it before we realize what has happened. Well let me just speak for myself. For example, while going through my divorce. I knew I wanted it to happen long before it actually happened. I already knew my worth and knew I couldn’t do another day of the marriage. I am a faith based person and I believe I stayed alot longer than I should have because I wanted to fight for it. I didn’t want to give up. We had both agreed that Divorce was not going to be an option but it seems like when it happened it happened so quick it was like I felt lost. I didn’t think of what to do afterwards I just knew I wasn’t able to give him what he needed and vice versa. I mean 15 years almost 16 years in and we have come to let’s just agree to disagree permanently. I knew I did all that could be done and exhausted all resources to the point it was almost life or death for me. I chose me. 5 months later he chose to marry again. Well, am I hurt? No, I pray and hope he finds the happiness he is looking for. It’s just another test to build my strength. It is taking me time to adjust. I have had 2 life challenges happen to me back to back. Well, actually I had been stressed for years questioning my marriage, which lead to stress at work with a supervisor, Battling Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma Cancer and then the divorce, whole new lifestyle change by living on my own for the first time in my life with 2 children, shingles, pneumonia, after effects of cancer, and the blessing of it all I got through it all. I trusted God through it all. I held on to his unchanging hands. I trusted God and was one on one with God. There were times I thought back and knew that it was all God. How do you battle cancer without family and friends coming to visit you due to a pandemic? Going to Dr. Appts alone. Going through Surgeries alone, going through Chemotherapy alone and coming home to a full but empty house. One hug, One kiss, One let me lay with you would have been nice. How do you not have any affection through the most devastating time of my life? But GOD. When I closed my eyes at night I would squeeze a white polar bear real tight as I lay on the couch for 2 years, couldn’t lay in a bed with someone who has no hope or love for God and who can’t pray or hold me and tell God, thank you for wrapping your loving arms around me and letting me lay at your feet as you give me rest. I also kept saying Yall about witnessing a miracle. It doesn’t make sense now but in the end it will all make sense. It’s not the end because the blessings still continue to flow. I always say Trust God and Trust the process. He knows best. He brings you to it and he will bring you through. Words have power. My church has been doing this spirit training that has equipped me with what I needed. I know when I have moments when I want to be angry, stressed, worried I know I just think of things that are good, pure and true. When you can pull from God’s promises it shows God you trust Him anyway, no matter what. The test God’s way of letting you know you are the chosen one for this test and he didn’t bring it to you to fail he brought it to you to strengthen you. That song by Whitney Houston comes to mind, “I didn’t know my own strength”
I didn’t know my own strength
And I crashed down and I tumbled but I did not crumble
I got through all the pain
I didn’t know my own strength
We don’t know our own strength until God tests us. Just know your test will take you to a higher level of faith. Allow God to work in your life because the adversities can’t be done alone and the only consistent thing will be God and God alone. The next time you face a challenge, roll your sleeves and let God know you trust him. If He trusts you with this adversity you can definitely trust Him to get you through with his grace and mercy. He has you covered. Will you pass the test? He only gives his test to his toughest soldiers. So keep the faith, trust God and Trust the process. Love you fam! #BeIntentional #BeConsistent #BePresent